War Legal....haha....get it.....I am so funny.....where'd my life go?...

So, sadly, another life update. Too much thinking to make me write funny stuff. Law school has beaten the wit out of me. I think I've figured out the basic premise to master every class though. This is Spencer's Law School 101. Send me money and I'll make you a little diploma.

Criminal Law: If you're a criminal, you're in good shape, as legislatures are very bad at making laws. Even if they look like they get it right, the Supreme Court will bail you out. So go get 'em, tiger.

Torts: If something happens and you're within a square kilometer of it, you're liable. Trust me.

Contracts: Never sign anything. If you do, though, there are approximately 738 ways to get out of it.

Legal Research and Writing: Make every (Me v. Inner Dialogue, 34 F.2d 322, 414 (Wis. 2005)) sentence that you ( id. at 396) write as (Wisconsin v. Alabama, 34 A.2d 676, 423 (Mich. 1897)) short as you (Marcilliat v. Coghlan, 564 U.S. 453, 501 (1904)) can, but include ( Smith v. Bad Luck, 345 U.S. 456, 457 (2004)) as many citations ( id. at 459) as humanly possible, ( Auburn v. Gamecocks, 48 P.3d 321, 333).

So I just saved you like $21,000, roughly, and three years of your life.